Reflections on My 5-Week Sabbatical From a Sensitive Therapist
For my 40th birthday this year, I decided to gift myself a 5-week sabbatical from seeing clients. Naturally I wanted time to celebrate and reflect on this milestone, but also I noticed myself starting to dread work days and desperately needed some time away from supporting others. Being a therapist is really fulfilling work, but can also become very emotionally draining at times when you’re an empathetic/empathic HST! Unlike many other jobs, it requires giving so much more of yourself.
To complicate matters, the embodiment of being a therapist doesn’t stop when your last session is done for the day. Engaging from a heart-centered, reflective, empathetic space often overlaps with how you are in the world - at least for me it does! Being a therapist can be hard to pull apart from, especially if you played the role of support person long before you became a licensed professional.
Personally, I consider being a therapist sacred, meaningful work but it does take a toll and I am grateful to have had the privilege to step away from it for a while. It helped me see how I was starting to lose myself in this work that I value so much. What helped me realize that it was time to take a break is that I just couldn’t stop taking on the emotions of my clients no matter what I did. I felt really saturated and exhausted after the last few years.
Making Rest the Norm
While doing research in preparation for my time away, I was delighted to discover just how common it is for therapists to take extended time off. Of course, parental leaves are routine when a therapist welcomes a new baby into their family and therapists often step away out of necessity due to burnout or illness, but I also learned about therapists who:
take a week off every month for integration and rest
build in regular month-long sabbaticals every year
have taken many months off to travel, write, or pursue passion projects
Initially I felt shame and a flood of other emotions around my need to put a pause on being a therapist for awhile:
What did it say about my level of care for my clients?
Did I waste six years of my life going to school and getting licensed?
Am I just not suited for this work?
Will my clients be okay?
Despite feeling vulnerable, I began opening up about my need for a break with some colleagues I trust. The number of fellow HSTs who were also considering taking a sabbatical or even NOT being a therapist anymore was surprising but also validating. I wasn’t alone.
Is Burnout a Badge of Honor?
As I’ve talked about this topic more with others, I have to wonder why we aren’t encouraged to talk about these feelings more? At times therapists can throw around burnout like an inevitable part of the work or worse, a badge of honor, but it needs to be taken more seriously. Being a therapist cannot be treated just like any other job where you only take off weekends and holidays. There needs to be a radically different model. Perhaps regularly stepping away to recharge and reconnect with yourself should be part of the framework of being a therapist, don’t you think?
My time away helped me realize just how badly I needed a break to immerse in my own experiences and inner world without any distractions. So many emotions came to the surface and I slept A LOT! Clearly I needed this more than I even realized.
Back to Seeing Clients
Two weeks have now passed since I returned to seeing clients and I’ve been easing back in really slowly, not putting any pressure on myself to accept new clients or even clear out my email inbox just yet! There’s still so many thoughts and insights to integrate for my time away and I don’t want to skip over that process. What was immediately apparent though is a renewed sense of self-awareness and a reset in how I approach my clinical work.
Already I’m noticing that I have more capacity to track and regulate the emotional impact of the work, not feeling so tired after every day. Plus, I’ve been able to be even more boundaried with my schedule on days I see clients - making sure I don’t try to squeeze extra tasks in, as tempting as it is for this perfectionist!
Since I have 30-minute breaks between clients, I’ll write my note, go for a short walk (or hop on the little treadmill that slides under my couch), and then spend some time reflecting and recharging. Today after my last session and writing the note, I spontaneously did some stretching and then lounged while I listened to music. This is a huge difference from what was happening before my sabbatical - being stuck in my chair or distracting myself with social media at the end of the day!
Deciding How Much to Give
Although the reality of my sabbatical turned out to be different than I imagined (resting versus exploring), I would consider it a big success and am planning to take a month off every year from now on. My biggest takeaway is a reminder to think outside the box when setting up your practice and your vacation schedule. The work of being a therapist is unique and time off needs to be structured differently. Along with this, I’m asking myself:
How much of myself can I give to this work?
How much energy am I willing to give?
What do I need for myself to make being a therapist viable long-term?
Where am I in this process?
I hope this inspires you to check in with yourself and make a plan for your next vacation or perhaps your first sabbatical.
Six Simple Steps to Six Weeks Vacation
Getting the time off you need each year often feels impossible because of the double whammy of:
Paying for trips and holiday plans…
While also NOT GETTING PAID because you’re not seeing clients
If you're...
Overworked, overwhelmed, and burned out in your practice.
Going long stretches without taking any or enough time off to feel your best.
Feel jealous or resentful when clients talk about their vacations because you can’t afford to take a break.
Watch the Six Simple Steps to Six Weeks Vacation workshop.
This workshop will…
Help you prioritize your well-being by taking the paid time off you truly need.
Take breaks from clinical work without the stress of lost income.
Have enough money set aside to take exciting trips with family and friends.
Create a life where there is no financial anxiety if you are sick or just need a day off.
Includes an in-depth workbook with a vacation fund calculator and tutorial video so you know just how much to set aside each week to take the vacation, holiday, and sick time you need every year!
Ready to take more time off without worrying about lost income? Sign up here.
